Here’s the ultimate list of do’s and don’ts that will have you chuckling all the way to the Holy Land. Buckle up, because we’re about to mix sacred ancient wisdom with a sprinkle of modern-day madness.
Do’s:
- Do wear your sunglasses upside down – Because why not start a new fashion trend in the land where miracles happen?
- Do practice your camel selfie skills – Because if you don’t post a camel selfie, did you even visit Israel?
- Do learn to say “Shalom” in five different accents – Impress locals with your multicultural greeting skills. Bonus points if you sound like a pirate.
- Do bring a spoon everywhere – For spontaneous hummus opportunities. You never know when you’ll stumble upon the hummus of your dreams.
- Do use Google Maps to find the parting of the Red Sea – Spoiler: It might just lead you to a great beach instead.
- Do dress as a superhero on Tuesdays – Just because. Maybe you’ll start a national trend.
- Do engage in a serious debate about which falafel stand is the best – It’s the national sport.
Don’ts:
- Don’t try to walk on water at the Dead Sea – Spoiler: You’ll float, not walk. But pretending to be a human boat is highly encouraged.
- Don’t forget to pack your bag with two essentials: sunscreen and jokes – One to protect you from the sun, and the other to break the ice with locals.
- Don’t challenge a local to a hummus-making contest – You will lose. But you’ll win at making friends.
- Don’t wait for Moses to guide you through the desert – GPS is slightly more reliable these days.
- Don’t play hide and seek at the Western Wall – You’re supposed to leave notes, not yourself.
- Don’t ask for ice in your wine – Unless you want to witness a genuine look of horror.
- Don’t use “Shalom” as an answer to every question – Although it’s funny to see how far you can get with just one word.
- And finally, don’t forget to leave room in your suitcase for memories, stories, and maybe a small rock from the desert – Because nothing says “I’ve been to Israel” like a piece of the Holy Land in your living room.
Remember, Israel is a land of history, mystery, and a whole lot of hummus. Follow these do’s and don’ts, and you’re guaranteed to have an unforgettable adventure—filled with laughter, wonder, and maybe a new friend or two (or a camel). Enjoy the ride, and don’t take life too seriously; nobody gets out alive anyway!
See ya in the next post,
Shay